When married couples cannot agree on fundamental issues and believe they’ll never come to terms with their differences, they typically cite “irreconcilable differences” in the divorce petition.
Pastor Mark Kigozi, a renowned motivational speaker and television talk show host took to social media on Thursday wondering if there exists such a thing as “irreconcilable differences.”
He also wondered if such a statement should justify divorce among Christian couples in Uganda today.
This development drew mixed reactions from the Christian audience online, with some social media users simply terming “irreconcilable differences” as “pride” or “immovable ego.”
In the event of true love, all is reconcilable, all is forgivable, one said.
“Is there anything like, ‘God has not given me grace to stand that,'” Pastor Mark Kigozi asked.
Several believers quoted scripture against divorce, with emphasis on God’s ability to reconcile any coupe no matter how broken their relationship may be.
“Jeremiah 32:27, ”I am the Lord, the God of all mankind. Is anything too hard for me?”…We as humans can have difficulties and shortcoming too many to break the marriage covenant, but if we turn to God, there is nothing too big for Him,” one social media user said.
Later, several Pastors also came up to address the matter.
In his submission, Pastor Noah Sematimba of Breakthrough Miracle Life Ministries wrote, “while I am well aware of Jesus’ words about divorce.. yet I find myself unable to tell a woman who is being physically abused by her husband to stay in that home.”
As most scholars teach, God’s design for marriage was for it to be a holy covenant. For many, marriage is the fundamental building block of every community, church, state, nation, society and culture.
Bishop Isaiah Mbuga of Christ Heart Ministries International weighed in.
“As much as we are talking bible, sometimes we choose the parts of the bible we believe, especially those that reinforce our personal preferences and choices,” he said.
“Someone can convince you God said…. the marriage should start and tell you He is led to come out of it by the same God,” he said.
“When it comes to wife battering or spouse battering , you cant tell a person go back only to attend their funeral because they were trying to obey all the rules,” he added.
“When do you feel it right to tell them to separate,” Pastor Kigozi asked Bishop Mbuga, “I once told a lady to, and the guy turned on me plus the very lady I thought I was saving.”
Bishop Mbuga replied, “One that needs to depart doesn’t ask for counsel. One thinking about it does ask. If your life is in danger, take a break. If your life is in grave danger, take a long break. If you are in a life threatening situation, and leaving is the best option, do it.”
Senior Pastor of Masaka Pentecostal Church Sam Mukabi Zema said he has ‘saved many lives’ by advising separation for a season.
“On three of the occasions, they came to their senses and they are living happily there after. In one case I advised them to stay apart for a bit of time and they insisted to stay together and the result was catastrophic, the man beat up his wife and left her for dead. When later in the night she came back to herself, she killed him with a hoe. When I asked them to stay apart they had never had a physical fight only verbal wars. But I had a very strong impression to tell them to stay apart.”
Pastor Mukabi said he can advise ‘separation’ but not ‘divorce’.
Wallace E Fred, a profound bible scholar described “irreconcilable differences” as “strange fires”.
“The fire of the Holy Ghost can quench these fires, but do our foolish youthful hearts agree? No!! We want our way. So God allows us to wander into so much sorrow because we reject Holy Ghost Fire,” he said.
Social media user Peter Kigozi weighed in: “When heaven endorses marriage, no man can or should put it asunder. Governments are not above the word of God. They don’t even have authority apart from self authority to allow divorce. Gods word is above any government. Unless they have a heaven to take you.”
“Government has over stepped its bounds when it begins to dish out divorce certificates. Those who follow government decisions are doomed because its against Gods word. If you the man divorced your wife please go back to her. If you woman left your husband go back to your true husband,” he said, adding that “Grace is not a cover for sin but the ability not to sin against God.”
Mark Kigozi explained that he has noticed that in the body of Christ, many are quick to recommend separation and that many cannot tolerate any form of transgression, thus throw in the towel too quickly instead of working through their differences.
