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Life without a mother

By Dickson Tumuramye.

OPINION | Recently there has been a picture of two young children on social media from one part of Uganda who were critically starving. The pictures show another child bathing and taking care of them. We have seen many other children in the media who have been starved or mistreated mostly by their step mothers.

As I watched all these pictures, immediately tears rolled all over my face. I looked at the pain such children go through, I then remembered life without a mother. The most recent incident was on a local Television where a stepmother burnt a girl-child’s private parts. Regardless of what the child did, she did not deserve such inhumane treatment.

We all know that women are more multi-tasked than men. Women are also good at taking good of children than men. I really try my best to take care of my children, but I have seen that there are some things my wife does, which I cannot manage. This is a reason why all children should grow in the hands of their real mothers.

I have seen many families where a daddy dies when children are still very young, but the mom struggles all she can to see the best out of her children. Many children have become very successful in the hands of their single mothers. It is a different case with men who have lost their wives and are left to care of children single handedly. Men can raise a family, but mothers build a home in all circumstances!

I lost my mother immediately after finishing my first degree twelve years ago. I was already 23 years old and had started working. But since then, my life has never been the same. Every time I experience a challenge, I always feel “I wish my mom was around, she would understand, console, counsel comfort….me and many other thoughts and imaginations! It is not easy to go through life without a mother. Recalling all she did for me, how she covered up for me before my daddy and the good words of counsel have made me what I am today.

I am not saying that my daddy has not done great in my life, but the invisible hand of a mother in a child’s life is unsurpassed. Miriam Carishma once said “God cannot be present everywhere, so, he created mothers! You lose your mom – you literally lose your world!” she covers a lot in one’s life. But without her, your life seem to be missing a lot in nurturing and development.

Even when my father remarried, our family has never been one and strong as when our dear mom was alive. We sometimes sit as siblings and make fun of those moments we cherished with her. And when we have tried to treat our stepmom like our own, she stills puts a boundary in between to insinuate that I am not your biological mother.

My appeal to the world is to embrace every child as your very own. There are those children who are living in child-headed homes and have no one to remember them. They need compassion from you and me. They need our guidance on how to cope up with daily challenges. Every child without a mother feels that s/he lost a person who loves you more than themselves. All these children need love that cover the multitude of suffering they experience.

The writer is a Child Advocate.

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